6.27.2007

So What

Sometimes, you just gotta say: "SO WHAT", when you're "Kind of Blue".

Can't say it any better than Miles and John did. Man, I love this song.




Peace and Love,

nosthegametoo

5.16.2007

STANDING ON THE SHOULDERS OF OTHERS

Note: Although we don’t seem to be blogging all that often anymore, we miss all of our readers. Thank you all for your very different perspectives.

I think everyone can agree that people need people. It’s just an unavoidable fact of life. For those of us fortunate enough to have the vast majority of our family members and loved ones still with us, it’s important to remember to thank them while they are still around; sending beautiful memorials and flowers are nice when someone passes, but they really don’t need them.

But are there times when those around us are really crushing us by standing on our shoulders?? I’m sure most of us have experienced this at one time or the other. Sometimes, even though we love them dearly and with our entire hearts, our shoulders may not be broad enough to handle the weight of those we support.

How does this pertain to men and women’s misunderstandings of each other?

Well… what comes to mind is Economics, which is the study of how resources are allocated. Not unlike any other resource, the life and energy that we expend are finite. Some of us have more than others, but no matter what, there is just so much of us to go around.

Now, we all need assistance. The level of the assistance we may need varies considerably depending on the person. For example, ever had that family member or friend who has no concept of self-sufficiency and is always in need of a crutch?? It’s daunting.

Although complete independence from others is an allusion, complete dependence is not. At some level we are all dependent on something; maybe a job… maybe an investment… maybe an emotional support… maybe a lover… maybe a sympathetic ear… or so on.

But what happens when someone draws from the well one too many times??

Do you think it has the unintended consequence of breeding resentment against someone special to you???

Or maybe we just have to shut up and take it. But there's definately something unsettling about that prospect.

Peace and Love,

nosthegametoo

2.22.2007

Can love be cold?

Let me start with thanking all our loyal readership for support and love. I truly appreciate emails.

Not long time ago I was driving and thinking, what is love? Is it supposed to be warm and fuzzy or cold? I do not know when I love people do I love the person or the person I created in my mind. Not long time ago I was question my own behavior and comparing it to my peers. I do not think love supposed to hurt but I do not think it is all peachy either.

I used to think love is the intimate moments/intimacy people share. Hmmm, uhhh ohh that was not it!

Love used to be a passion in my dictionary for a long time. That was not it! Actually passion brought a lof of difficulties in my life. SO I stay away from it nowadays!

Love supposed to be commitment. Oh that is not love at all I think. I have seen a lot of people who are in committed relationship but not in love at all. They always repsect each other, but love is not part of that ingredient. Isn't that what we want from love? Maybe love is aggregation of a lot of factors?

I used to think LOVE is the strong support for each other. Hmmm that is out the window since I truly love my ex-boyfriend and have a stronger bonds now than when we dated.

I used to think love is the friendship ,sharing happiness & sadness 2gether. Oh well that is not true either. Because I had that too.

Maybe love is the CHASE. A mental chase or a mental dependency. I do not know. I do not know what is love? Can you taste love? Can you punch love? Is love A GOD? Is LOVE a monster?

As I am sitting here and crying my life off and thinking what is love? I hope my disturbed soul is not hanging over you head right now?


With love and adoration,
NO_THE_GAME

1.31.2007

Moody Blue

OUR 100th POST!!

Note: Hello everyone. I’m happy to say that here at our little blog about relationships and interacting with others, we have finally reached our 100th posting. Thank you so very much for all of your support, emails and comments, even when we’re not around as much as we would like. I have learned so much from all of you, so thank you for taking the time to share your wisdom with us and each other.


ARE YOU IN THE FULL MOOD?

Recently, I happened to be driving and listening to the radio. The man in the radio was talking about relationships and he broke people in relationships down into two types:

The Moody – or more plainly put, people whose emotions rapidly run hot or cold.

The Non-Moody – People whose emotions do not often fluctuate far and quick.

His main point was that he never really saw two people get together as mates who were “Moody”. He said that he more often than not saw one partner that was Moody, and another who was not. Although, he did quality his thinking by saying he occasionally saw a couple with two partners who were not Moody.

I partially agree with the guy’s point of view, but I would quality it by saying this: it’s not that two Moody people don’t get together all the time, I see it constantly, they just don’t seem to stay together because neither one of them can put up with the other person’s shit.

How does this pertain to men and women’s misunderstandings of each other?

Well… It seems to me that we all have moods. I think that is pretty much a given. They go up and down, here and there. We have to be compassionate in our dealings with our mates and mindful of their feelings, all the while being careful to also be compassionate enough to share painful truths. And all at the same time we have our own moods and feelings to deal with. I suppose that’s why a functioning relationship doesn’t “just happen”.

In my experience, there are different levels of moodiness. Obviously, the worst is the kind that leads someone to fly off the handle irrationally and act crazy. There’s no excuse for that, and I would suggest to anyone that you don’t even attempt to deal with someone like that.

But truth be told, it’s the subtle mood swings/shifts that can make a relationship hard to deal with. Over time, we can let the small things that irritate us about our partner manifest into a gigantic monster. To draw a human parallel, it’s probably close to drinking diluted Drain-O for an extended period of time… you can’t keep that kind of mess up for long, even if it doesn’t poison you immediately.

I wish I had a cure for Moodiness, but I don’t. Although, the best remedy seems to be listening. Tender issues and feelings require tender touches and attention. If your partner is unreasonable or unwilling to listen there are some problems. Those problems may be:

1. You can’t communicate the issues, so you dance around it.
2. You play the ever-favorite teenage “figure it out” game.
3. You use words to express emotion, rather than convey ideas.
4. You’re more interested in spouting off a point, rather than presenting an issue.
5. … or maybe, just maybe… you’re dealing with an ass (that’s possible too).


Either way, this is a difficult issue to tackle. I’m going to think about this one some more. I have a lot of say about how mood swings affect a relationship.

My question is this: Do you think Moody people avoid other Moody people? And if so, why do you think that is?

Peace & Love from us Both

nosthegametoo & No_the_game

1.29.2007

Hello Ladies and Gentlemen


Normally, we don't usually put up videos on the blog, but for some reason, I thought this might be appropriate.

Thanks to everyone who still stops by every now and then. I don't get to post often these days, but I do miss the blog, so I'll be popping back in and theorizing about life, love and relationships.

Peace and Love,

nosthegametoo


1.13.2007

Being different means different treatment *_*

My dear readership I know it is not what i generally put up on our blog. But that being said I feel that I know you guys well enough to share part of my daily life and struggles. I hope it is not too emotionally draining.

I love you guys. I do think about you guys more than you think. I think you guys are a good friend to me. You guys know more about my feelings then the people who see me daily or around me. I just wanted to share part of me.

With love and a HAPPY MR. KING DAY!

Much love and respect,
NO_the_GAME



Dear Dr.****
I got your email a couple days ago and read it a couple times. I am so glad schools doing well and there is some progress. Saint Louis needs progress badly. I also would like to talk to you about something that I have never talked before.

You might find my email a bit weird. I just need to talk to somebody who can understand me. I have being struggling with myself for a while now. It seems like I question everything in life nowadays more than I ever did. I question whether I made right choice to come to America, whether I am doing what I meant to do, whether I am doing right things by choosing not to belong to any types of religious believes.

I think being discriminated constantly or hearing unnecessary comments making me tired. Those comments getting to me. It is making me feel weak day after day. I know Chicago way better than STL but still it is not an easy task. I sometimes tell myself I just came to America wrong time. I do know the cause why I am treated differently but still it can be very emotionally draining.

I question and wonder about my future in America as well as in Azerbaijan. I have being following politics in Azerbaijan and it is not promising for me at all. I know for sure right now I do not want to return there either.

I am in a such situation that I am not emotionally close to my family anymore. We lived a part so long we do not relate to each other anymore. I lived away from them most of my adulthood. For the matter of fact I was 16 when I left for a college. So I even can not talk about issues to my family that bothers me. They just do not understand me. They tell me if you are not happy there then come back to Azerbaijan. They also do not understand if I go back I will not want to live under the current government. If I go back I will end up in jail because of my political views.

The question I have for you is " Is it normal to feel confused in life?"

I also plan to start to teach financial literacy to Hispanic and low income families. I think I need to keep myself more busy otherwise I will go crazy soon.

Not a long time ago I uploaded a couple of videos on Internet, which was not well thought at all, but reflected my views on current situations in America and foreign policy. I must admit my video was nowhere close to well thought but it was viewed over 80,000 times on google.  

I am a biggest NPR fan and would like to know what would it take me to get on NPR or become a commentator? I know you do regular commentary on it. I just want to be heard and I want to break those stereotypes that exist in our society. I am not better or worse than anybody who does not look like me. I cry when I hear fallen solders. I cry and laugh when I listen to NPR. I am just no different but I do get treated differently. It is tiring at least. Some days better than others some are not. I would appreciate  any type of suggestions or directions if it is possible to get on NPR.

I will start training for Chicago Marathon for this year. I will run 8K in Chicago on March 25. I wish that will fresh start my training. I wanted to end my message on the brighter note.


Regards,

****

1.07.2007

Hello All

I just wanted to come and drop a line. I am having some issues at the place called J. O. B. You guys know how that goes? If you do not have money to feed the belly then love problems just look a fluke :)

I need prayers and support. Love ya all!

With Love,
No_the_game