9.14.2006

All right !!! Raise Up and Open your ears!!! Here come my thoughts bloggerland!!!

WHEN THERE IS NO RELATIONSHIP DISCUSSED and No RESPONSIBILITES WERE TAKEN as GIRL/BOYFRIEND it is called
F U C K E R S H I P.

My co – blogger have never put anything that was this passionate. This topic belled the rings too close to home. He reminded me one of the relationships I used to be in.

I used to date a guy for 5 years. I gave him 110% of me in return he acted out off ordinary one day and withdrew. 6 month later he got married to a normal looking girl. I do not consider myself “the world beauty princess” but I never had anybody to turn around and throw up. Needless to say she was not even close to me. So he got married and moved on so did I.

After him I was so hurt, I have decided not to date to anybody but not exclude sexual life. Without getting into details, those years I meet a few people. Anyhow, all these times I also meet a guy who was hurt almost the same way I was. We become friends and later on much more. I used to tell him things “as is”(sexual life of mine) but once he recommended me not tell him about my FUCK life because it made him to loose respect for me. So, from that point on I was careful of his feelings.

In between we used to talk about how it would be nice to be with each other exclusively. But we would never make to that point because every time one of us would back off. I admitted my own wrongdoings and he sort of admitted his. ( He was not an angel. Because he never told me his side of story that did not mean they were not there)

Brefily to say we were in an OPEN- END relationship. We both knew it. Actually it was him who named our “friends” relationship “AN OPEN-ENDED” relationship. He used to feed me with little piece of info about how he is trying to date. And LORD knows he mastered KEEP IT SECRET shit before anybody else did in the world.

We had our “friendship” for almost 3 years. We never had a problem till the day I told “friend” I wanted to be serious with him, because I developed strong feelings for him and I wanted to give LOVE a try again. I knew this guy years and I truelly appreciated him. He made me a better person for sure.
As soon as he heard my intentions that I wanted to be in a serious relationship he started accusing me and calling me names. He did not exactly call me names but he would describe me as if I was the last street-walker on the streets.

The most fundamental thing he kept forgetting was that he never gave me even a title of GIRL FRIEND or never claimed he was my BOY FRIEND. I was a friend and that was how I was known around his circle. When he accused me, it seemed he forgot that HE used to be O.K with “OPEN-END” fuckership . For some reason he kept forgetting that. He forgot that it was him who used to tell me "I AM EMOTIONALLY HURT and cannot move on." ( I am not trying to be an ANGEL here)

Needless to say he took a huge pride to dirt my name and walk all over my pride and act as if he Just jumped off Jesus Christ's arm.

When we he decided to broke up with me he accused me with the following:

- Cheater and lier


I yet to understand how one can cheat when there is no EXCLUSIVITY or word of GIRL/BOY FRIEND or RESPONSIBLITY discussed or agree on.


I think romantic relationships should be agreed on and discussed. Once it is agreed on then it is a BOND. That was why I brought up EXCLUSIVE relationship to him and that was when all troubles started.


The question I have to all of your guys
  1. DO you think ONE SHOULD BE held responsible for a relationship that was not discussed and nobody took responsibility for it or nobody claimed it?
  2. DO you think people, who are in I DO NOT WANT TO BE RESPONSIBLE or TIED DOWN relationship, deserves to demand RESERVE YOURSELF FOR ME claim?
  3. Or blame each other for adultry??????????

IT WILL CONTINUE....

WITH LOVE,

NO_THE_GAME

5 comments:

Naomi said...

This is an amazing site! I'm glad I found you!

Deb said...

If nothing is discussed, then unfortunately, "it is what it is"... No ties, no boundaries and no rights to stake their claim.

Discussion, listening and understanding. Three ingredients for a relationship that'll succeed.

Åsa said...

No The Game: I’m sorry you feel so hurt! I would think if someone never had introduced me as his girlfriend, or talked about the exclusive part (if I was referred to as girlfriend I would have taken that as being exclusive) – I would consider myself a “free agent”. Sounds to me like he is just projecting his weaknesses onto you, trying to make you the “bad person” here instead of taking his responsibility. If he really saw your relationship as being exclusive: how come he never acted that way? Did he want to keep the cake and eat it too? He only has himself to blame here. Maybe he learned that if he wants to be with someone: he has to show that with his actions and declare it with words as well. You are not to blame for his shortcomings.

Sumeeta said...

I think you have a wonderful idea: relationships should be discussed first before a bond is made. But is any person who finds themselves falling in love that logical? All of us, male and female, want that romantic dream that we will find our soulmates and that everything will fall into place when we do so. Unfortunately, relationships do not work that way. You have wonderful ideas, but putting them into practice can be really hard.

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Miz JJ said...

Well at least you found out how he truly felt about you. It must have hurt, but it would have hurt more if he agreed to be your man and then did that.